As of today, I’ve meditated for 16 days in a row.
By now, I expected I’d be floating on waves of peace and bliss all day long – that the power of my meditation practice would quell the storms of my mind and transform me into a more serene version of myself. So far, no dice.
In fact, sometimes the exact opposite feelings arise. My time in meditation is peaceful and still. Then, I get up from my cushion. No sooner have I left my practice than something happens: I burn the toast; I stub my toe; I snap at my husband. The memory of my practice vanishes in a flash and I’m left with my impatience or my stubbornness. Isn’t this meditation business supposed to help keep these reactions at bay?
One meditation technique I’ve been exploring is focusing on the space between breaths. This practice challenges me deeply. The space between an inhale and an exhale feels infinitesimal. Similarly, the space between a minor irritation and my reaction seems minute. Something happens and my reaction follows in milliseconds.
How does this dynamic change? With practice. With patience. With compassion. Each day that I meditate, I take one step closer into the space between my thoughts. Often, the steps are so small that I can barely sense any movement or progress at all. But, I’m choosing to take a step. That’s what matters.
How are you trying to expand the space between?
Tags: how to meditate, meditation, meditation practice, meditation practices, seated meditation
Great post! I’m a mom, so the majority of my meditation time is mindfulness in movement. Remember Thich Nhat Hanh’s essay on being fully present while doing dishes? Yup.
The hard part for me, is like you mention. When I step out of meditation, how do I bring that with me? I just keep practicing and I will for the rest of my life. I think of it like the muscle memory in asana. I’ll never master it, but if I let go, my body/mind will remember the state and allow me to slip into it when needed. Sometimes, sometimes, it works.
So beautifully said, Zoie! It’s a lifelong practice, for sure.
They say that the benefits of meditation comes only after you’ve been doing it for years and years and even then you may only see an inkling of a “benefit”. But you gotta just do it anyway. It’s seriously a saving grace but we get so caught up in seeing the result we forget that the true beauty of the practice is in the process. Luff you!! <3
You’re so right, T! I am very goal-oriented, so it’s hard for me sometimes to let that go and revel in the beauty of the process. Love you!
16 days in a row — ROCK ON!
that’s awesome!!!
I’m just starting to really dedicate myself to a meditation practice. I’ve noticed the same thing…I feel great for the time I’m there, but then I’m back to my spacey self!
I’m determined to keep the practice up though…I’m sure I’ll figure it out in time! Good luck!